About Me

Let's see...where should I start? Please forgive me as this is the first time I've ever had a blog. It took me quite awhile to learn to type since I am without thumbs. I guess I should introduce myself first. Hi, my name is Martini Olivia (leave it alone - I didn't pick it!) and I am a white Miniature Schnauzer. Do not be fooled by the reference to small stature -I can promise you that if we ever met, you wouldn't believe how big I actually am! I feel that it is all about presence. Plus...well, let's just say that it's not the most accurate description. Some would say it is a weight problem (I know Alex sure does), but I completely disagree. I'm in a life long love affair and my partner is anything I can consume. I wouldn't quite limit it to food. But that's another story. We'll come back to that.

I mainly reside in Austin, Texas, but also have a country home with my roommate's parents. I have a two bedroom apartment all to myself...well, besides my human, Alex. Here's a picture of both of us. I know some of you out there are visual learners. Hopefully, this will help you keep things straight.

Yeah, I know it's a Christmas picture. Please disregard that sweater...Sigh. We will talk more about clothes later.

What was I saying...ah, yes, my human. I know, I know -you thought it was a boy. Got ya. (Besides do you really think a boy is dumb enough to create a blog and devote it completely to what is most likely his dog's perspective on life? Exactly.) Nope, Alex is a girl. The majority of the time we get along okay. Somtimes, she tries to pretend -ha-that she is in charge. Go figure! Crazy humans and their thumbs.

We have both agreed that it is better not to act like I am her child. I think it's demeaning and Alex has some sort of issue with the fact that her biological clock is starting to tick louder so no saying "Martini's mom" (oops, probably wasn't supposed to mention the clock thing...aw, screw it). The term we decided on after a very democratic process (everytime Alex said something I didn't like, I licked my ass so she caught my drift pretty quick) is roommate. Now, even though she pays the bills, I think that my role in the relationship is MUCH more important. After all, I decide who may enter.

What else? I'm 28 right now...in dog years of course. I didn't feel like having a party this past year (being so close to 30 and whatnot), but man, was my 21st birthday AWESOME. I had a Mexican Martini theme and my friends brought their owners and I got drunk and passed out around midnight. Didn't puke though. I'm a baller like that. Beer is nothing when you say hello by smelling butts.

Just to give you a little better idea what I'm all about, I thought I would share with you some of my favorite things: food, attention, talking, being a monster, food, welcoming people by barking (try it some time -the humans will freak), food, and hanging out at my local dive bar, Bull McCabe's. Other than that, I guess I'd like to say welcome and enjoy. I'll try to keep you updated with everything I'm doing. We'll see how it goes.

-Martini